hello 911 yes
yes i’ll hold
- man: when you dress like that it's like putting a steak in front of a dog. what do you expect?
- woman: *proves that even dogs have discipline*
- man: wHat!!!!!11!!!?????? WHY ??????????????????????????????????? ARE YOU SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!! COMPARING US FREE-THINKING MALE CITIZENS TO DOGS????????????????????/ FEMINISM IS MISANDRY!!!!!1!!!!!111!! WHERE DID OUR MEN'S RIGHTS GO
Why do guys sit like they need to take eight fucking seats. Your dick ain’t that big close your fucking legs
Would you mind expanding a bit on your Howard Stark hulk rage feels? :)
I’m gonna keep this to the MCU because thinking about 616 Howard Stark (who is a drunk, unpredictable, abusive asshole who belittles Tony and fucking threatens him with violence what the fuck) makes me foam at the mouth in rage.
Let’s pick this one quote from IM2:
“He was cold, he was calculating. He never told me he loved me, he never told me he liked me so it’s a little tough for me to digest when you’re telling me he said the whole future was riding on me and he’s passing it down. I don’t get that. We’re talking about a guy whose happiest day was when he shipped me off to boarding school.”
Look at Fifty Shades Of Grey's knot.
Now look at my knot.
Now back at FSoG. Now back at me.
This is the knot your knot could look like if you bothered to ask actual BDSM players, or hell, even their YouTube channels, before making a movie…
- Roommate: Doesn't it freak you out that in another universe there's a version of you that hates Coke and loves Pepsi.
- Me: That universe doesn't exist. And if it does I will search it out and destroy it.
the first three words you see are what you want most in life right now
Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told Madonna, one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to go and f*** herself, the local media are reporting exclusively.
“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.
In further discussions with journalists from the media, the kid stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”
“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.
The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.
“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.
THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE